Spare a thought for your accountant

Spare a thought for your accountant 
He’s trying to do his best 
To earn a decent living 
Just like all the rest 

Doing all that double entry’s 
Not as easy as it looks 
It takes years and years of practice 
To cook a set of books 

But when the debits and the credits 
Don’t add up quite as they should 
Staring at the door or window 
Doesn’t do a lot of good 

It’s said two things are sure in life 
Death and taxes are the pair 
But one more fact is certain 
Your accountant’s thinning hair! 

The tax rules alter constantly 
He struggles to keep pace 
Tax, NI and VAT 
Etch deep lines in his face 

And even when the job is done 
The client may not pay 
So your accountant’ll keep a’counting 

Until retirement day

Bible & TV Guide

They lie on the table side by side, The Holy Bible and the TV Guide.
One is well worn and cherished with pride.
Not the Bible, but the TV Guide.
One is used daily to help folk decide.
No, not the Bible, but the TV Guide.
As the pages are turned, what shall they see?
Oh, what does it matter, turn on the TV.
So they open the book in which they confide.
No, not the Bible, but the TV Guide.
The Word of God is seldom read.
Maybe a verse before they fall into bed.
Exhausted and sleepy and tired as can be.
Not from reading the Bible, from watching TV.
So then back to the table side by side, Lie the Holy Bible and the TV Guide.
No time for prayer, no time for the Word,
The plan of Salvation is seldom heard.
But forgiveness of sin, so full and free,
Is found in the Bible, not on TV.

Foodbank – Food for thought

I’ll be there for you

I’ll be there my darling, through thick and through thin
When your mind’s in a mess and your head’s in a spin
When your plane’s been delayed, and you’ve missed the last train.
When life is just threatening to drive you insane
When your thrilling whodunit has lost its last page
When somebody tells you, you’re looking your age
When your coffee’s too cool, and your wine is too warm
When the forecast said “Fine”, but you’re out in a storm
When your quick break hotel, turns into a slum
And your holiday photos show only your thumb
When you park for five minutes in a resident’s bay
And return to discover you’ve been towed away
When the jeans that you bought in hope or in haste
Just stick on your hips and don’t reach round your waist
When the food you most like brings you out in red rashes
When as soon as you boot up the bloody thing crashes
So my darling, my sweetheart, my dear…
When you break a rule, when you act the fool
When you’ve got the flu, when you’re in a stew
When you’re last in the queue, don’t feel blue’cause
I’m telling you, I’ll be there.

by Louise Cuddon

Recipe for happily ever after

Today will be perfect
In every single way.
A beautiful fairy tale
For your wedding day.
The theme of your day 
Is to have love and laughter 
And to live your days 
Happily ever after.

Living happily is 
What we need to survive,
So how does one keep
The magic alive? 
How do you light a spark
That never goes out?
And how does one live a life 
Without fear or doubt?

How do some people manage 
To keep their love strong?
And how do some couples 
Always feel like they belong?
What do you need to do
To stay in love forever
And make each day special
And grow fonder together?

Well, these very questions
You must address every day.
You must take the time 
To go out of your way,
To always share love 
And always share laughter,
To do whatever it takes 
To live happily ever after.

Here is a recipe 
I think is a must,
So let’s begin with 
Always having trust.
Don’t forget it’s important
To have total respect,
And to always stay loyal
To keep your love perfect.

You must communicate
Each and every day.
Three special little words
You must never forget to say,
“I love you.” It’s amazing
How these words make you feel
Happy, safe, and valued,
And they will keep your love real.

A simple act of kindness
Goes a long, long way.
Blend it with understanding
And you can’t go astray.
Don’t forget friendship.
It will help you to cope.
Add a sprinkle of faith 
And an abundance of hope.

Remember your smile.
It is beautiful to see.
It can brighten one’s day.
It can make you feel free.
So my wish for you both
Is you always have love and laughter, 
And I pray that you will enjoy
Your happily ever after.

By Ilona M. Blake

Maybe

Maybe we are supposed to meet the wrong people before we meet the right one so when they finally arrive we are truly grateful for the gift we have been given. 

Maybe it’s true that we don’t know what we have lost until we lose it but it is also true that we don’t know what we’re missing until it arrives. 

Maybe the happiest of people don’t have the best of everything, but make the best of everything that comes their way. 

Maybe the best kind of love is the kind where you sit on the sofa together, not saying a word, and walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you ever had. 

Maybe once in a lifetime, you find someone who not only touches your heart but also your soul, someone who loves you for who you are and not what you could be. 

Maybe the art of true love is not about finding the perfect person, but about seeing an imperfect person perfectly. 

Blessing for the broken-hearted

There is no remedy for love but to love more.– Henry David Thoreau

let us agree

for now that we will not say

the breaking makes us stronger

or that it is better to have this pain

than to have done without this love.

Let us promise

we will not tell ourselves

time will heal the wound,

when every dayour waking opens it anew.

Perhaps for now it can be enough

to simply marvel at the mystery

of how a heart so broken can go on beating,

as if it were made for precisely this—

as if it knows the only cure for love is more of it,

as if it sees the heart’s sole remedy for breaking is to love still,

as if it trusts that its own persistent pulse

is the rhythm of a blessing we cannot begin to fathom

but will save us nonetheless.

by Jan Richardson

I talked to a lady

by Tanya Howden

I talked to a lady yesterday
She didn’t know my name
She was amazed to hear about my past
and the places I had been

Her daughter’s life so similar
filled her with awe and fear
She looked at me bewildered
could this really be real? 

We talked about her family
We talked about her past
We talked about the folk she’d known
Their walk their talk their cheer

The ones who floated through her world
And those who stopped to share
We talked about the future
her hopes her dreams her fears

We talked about her sorrows
All the sadness life threw in
We talked about her children –
(Some things I shouldn’t hear!)

We giggled and cried and laughed
at a life so rich so full
And in a moment shared
sat in silence with our thoughts …

And I whispered “Goodnight Mother”
as her eyes succumbed to dreams 
I talked to a lady today
She didn’t know my name
She was amazed to hear about my past
and the places I had been
Her daughter’s life so similar
filled her with awe and fear
She looked at me bewildered
—

Dementia- The Thief

It took away your days and nights

and time became a blur.

It sucked your speech right from your mouth,

and your words became a slur.

It slowly imprisoned you from your life

when you couldn’t walk your miles.

It haunted your sleep and made you scared

and wiped away your smiles.

Because it’s not just memory loss

that dementia brings your soul,

It gives you tortuous unwanted gifts

to replace the ones it stole.

It switched your radiant laughter and joy

for agitation, sadness, and fear.

And stole your independence

and made your world become less clear.

Your loved ones watched you disappear

a little more each day.

They wished, but all so helplessly,

as it stole you right away.

And in the end are precious memories

that you possess no more.

But instead, your loved ones treasure them

deep inside their core.

I do not know if you remember me

or if I’ve been stolen from you too.

But dementia will never, ever steal away

the love I feel for you.

By Hannah Hillier

A Jewish Prayer

Blessed are those who give meaning to our lives;
holy and precious is the example they leave behind.
We pray:
May our sorrows diminish as we recall their strength.
May their wisdom protect us and help us to live.
Let our grief be transformed into tenderness
for those who are still with us.